I am very close to being done with Christmas shopping this year. Play doh and candy...Play doh and candy...if I keep saying them to myself perhaps I will remember to buy them!! I always get excited this time of year, not just because of the gifts that I buy for my crew but because the new year is coming. That means a fresh start...endless possibilities...and putting away the sadness and crap from this year.
This year was one of my favorites for the Enforcer and I. The year before was the hardest of our marriage but we survived and are stronger for it. This year was filled with maybes and what-ifs and could we or should we's.
This year brought people into our lives like my biological father and his new wife. It also strengthened relationships we had with people. Somehow I have friends, actually FRIENDS. People that want to talk to me and who listen to me without judging. They are just as crazy as I am but that makes it even better.
I have also lost people...not to death but to situations. I am deeply saddened that my family seems to be falling apart and taking sides. It's funny how siblings can and will turn on you in an instant over things and drama. And how sad is it if you are not on the "right" side you are outcast and overlooked.
In this season, especially, families should put aside their differences and come together. We have but a short time on this planet why waste it on jealousy and drama? Why not let go, look past the stupidity and spite and just love each other?
In today's society I think the one thing missing is wonder. Gravy is at the age where everything is new and she can remember and verbalize it. It makes everything right in the world when I see her expressions at listening to "Polar Express" being read by her favorite librarian or seeing Nana's house lit up by probably close to a million lights. Her eyes get big and she inhales a vast amount of air and just says, "Mama, I neber seen that before! It is beautiful and I love it!!" This is why I love Christmas most of all.
So my new year wishes...what could they be? I want to...no I WILL quit smoking. I will go to the gym at least once a week...and use my step at least once too. I will be nicer and not so quick to jump to conclusions. I will be less selfish and more giving, especially to my husband. But most of all I will cherish my children for life is far to short to do otherwise.
So Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone. May your holiday season be filled with love, peace and joy.
